Yes, the subject of this post is "Poison Boobs," but we'll get to that story in a few paragraphs.
First, I should mention a number of "Daddy blogs" that Elizabeth has pointed me to. The most famous is The Trixie Update. It's a well-crafted site, combining blogging with daily pictures and lots of great commentary by readers. But even better is that the author has written a bunch of web scripts that he uses for tracking sleep patterns, diaper usage, bottle consumption, etc. It's great to be a geek dad - I wish I'd done it first! :-)
Some of the other amusing blogs are Daddy Types, and Defective Yeti which covers more than just being a new parent, but which has a whole lot of funny stuff in there. I really do wish I could write stuff that was as funny as some of these other guys, and do it in what appears to be such an easy manner.
In any case, there are a number of sites around where a parent will refer to their spouse with a descriptive name, instead of their real name. So, for example, at Stork Notes, each pregnant woman's husband is called "dear hubby" (which is abbreviated to "DH"). And on the blogs, some of the men refer to their wives as "Queen" or "Fabulous Babe." After seeing this behavior repeat in a number of places, Elizabeth asked me why I didn't call her something like that on this blog. Ignoring the fact that some of these blogs never mention the owners' names, and hence using descriptive names is a way of helping to maintain anonymity, I pointed out that I called her "sweetie-pie" (at least to her face) a number of times. Somehow during the discussion, which included titltes such as "Attorney General," the suggestion "Sexy Lawyer Chick" came up. I seized upon it as a proper title (and one which just might also make her regret bringing the topic up in the first place), and declared that henceforth I will refer to her as Sexy Lawyer Chick, which I will at times abbreviate as SLC.
Well, it turns out that Sexy Lawyer Chick must, at times, possess Poison Boobs. That's the only theory we've been able to come up with to explain why Dorothy at times will scream when SLC tries to nurse her. Most of the time, Dorothy is happy to latch on and slurp up the nummies. But occasionally, she'll just scream and refuse, acting as if SLC were trying to poison her. It's lucky for us she's able to detect those times when Elizabeth's breasts turn poisonous...
In related news, Dorothy has been drooling a lot. When she was first born, we'd had a bunch of bibs, but almost never used them. Now we're more frequently putting one on her and leaving it on for most of the day, to catch at least some of the drool. Much of the drool is making its way onto her hands, which allows her to bypass the bib and smear the drool around.
So, in summary, the things that Dorothy has recently learned to do include:
Who knows what will happen next?!
Posted by Tom Nugent at July 5, 2004 10:01 PM | TrackBack